Dzifah Tamakloe

Your shadow leaves you when it gets dark

Growing up, I always thought the friends and loved ones you grew up with, will always be with you. Little did I know that was a terrible mistake on my part to think that way. We can all attest to the fact that, the people you grew up with will not be the people you will have around you all the time. We lose some of these loved ones via accident, and then then we become emotionally unstable.

Some of these loved ones leaves indelible marks in our hearts. Along the way, some friends you make may end up travelling and may never come back, others may get themselves involved in so many things. These creates and bring some form of disconnections and all these loses and disconnections brings so much emotional instability since we tend to love these people and will always wish they are around us all the time but suddenly we look around and they are no more. I have suffered series of emotional turbulence and I know you have suffered same due to the disconnection of loved ones and friends by death, by travelling overseas etc.

To be on the safer side, it is best you build your emotions such that you get to that level where your emotions no longer faces turbulence and that is what I call “emotional independence”. Attaining this level of maturity with your emotions will make you strong and happy all the time. Always understand that no friendship is permanent because we are in a temporal world. Learn to be independent when it comes to matters of emotions. This is because even your shadow leaves you when it gets dark.

 True happiness is not the offspring of ideal circumstances. It is not the result of the way others behave around you or the attention you get from them or the degree to which your spouse or others love and appreciate you.

 A life of emotional independence is one wherein your mood and self-esteem and self-worth and happiness are products of your own. Your feelings are independent of theirs. Others don’t “make” you sad or happy. You choose your emotional responses to life’s circumstances.

This is not to say you wouldn’t need others affection and love, we all need affection, care and love and always wished that our loved ones are with us always but then try to be emotionally independent to save you from the stress in situations where things go in opposite directions.

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